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How to Plan the Perfect Proposal: The Dos and Don’ts

By:  Jane Olagunju

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Marriage Proposal Dos and Don'ts

Planning the perfect marriage proposal involves thoughtful consideration and strategic execution. This comprehensive guide on marriage proposal dos and don’ts, coupled with expert engagement proposal advice, offers invaluable insights to ensure your moment is flawless. From selecting the right setting and ring to avoiding common pitfalls, each tip is tailored to help you plan a proposal that resonates with your partner’s desires and reflects your love story beautifully. Whether you opt for a grand gesture or an intimate affair, these guidelines will help you create a memorable and heartfelt proposal that leads to an enthusiastic ‘yes.’

The Dos: Proposal Checklist

The Dos Proposal Checklist

1. Set a Budget

As soon as you decide that you’re going to propose to your partner, don’t waste another second of your time – decide on a budget and start saving towards it. Remember that the proposal is not only about getting the ring; you also have to plan a proposal that will take their breath away.

2. Find the Perfect Ring (and Insure It)

Don’t settle for the first ring you find. The engagement ring is one piece of jewelry your partner will wear for a lifetime. So, ensure it’s in a style they’ll love and adore. You can get one custom-made and have it engraved to make it even more special. We can’t put a price on the value of an engagement ring, especially when you find the perfect one, which is why we highly recommend that you get it insured as soon as possible.

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3. Decide if It’ll Be Public or Private

Choosing a location is the most important aspect of planning the perfect proposal, and you should put a lot of thought into it by considering your partner’s preferences. Do they like a private and intimate setting, or would they prefer a grand ‘movie-like’ public gesture? Make sure you involve your loved ones if your partner would prefer this.

Read: Best Proposal Locations

4. Plan With Intent

The key to nailing the perfect proposal is to plan it for your partner. Gather as many ideas for inspiration but plan something completely original by adding personal touches in every detail to make it memorable. Consider everything from the location, decor and props, music and food down to the moment you pop the question. If you’re proposing outdoors, ensure that you consider the weather as well.

5. Prepare the Speech

Speaking from the heart is always the best way to go when it comes to the proposal speech. But if you like preparing ahead of time and don’t want to leave anything out, then you can write a speech and memorize it before the proposal day. Whichever way you go, remember to keep it short and simple and don’t beat yourself up if you fumble.

6. Keep It a Surprise

When we say ‘keep it a surprise,’ we don’t mean completely. Your partner should be aware that you’re thinking about getting married, and they should be on the same page as you. But anything aside from that should be on a need-to-know basis, and they don’t need to know when or where you’re planning to pop the question.

Read: Best First Valentine’s Day Gift Ideas

7. Capture the Moment

No matter where you plan on proposing, even if it’s at a holiday proposal location, ensure that you capture the moment on camera. Hire a professional photographer and have an engagement shoot right after your partner says ‘Yes’ because your proposal setup is already the perfect backdrop. But if you’re going for an intimate proposal, you can set up a camera right before you pop the question just to document the moment.

Read: Should You Propose Before or After Dinner? Find Out

The Don’ts: Proposal Mistakes to Avoid

The Don’ts Proposal Mistakes to Avoid

Avoid making these mistakes to ruin your special day.

1. Propose Without an Engagement Ring

This is ranked as the number one mistake to make when proposing. No matter how spontaneous you are or your proposal is, don’t do it if you don’t have an engagement ring to show for it. Even if you’re uncertain what ring style to get, simply get one that you can exchange or borrow a loved one’s ring.

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2. Copy Everything You See

Trends can die down. You can draw inspiration from them if needed, but don’t copy them to a T. You don’t want your proposal to be an exact copy of someone else’s. Take your time to come up with something original and perfectly unique for your partner.

3. Involve Too Many People

Involve the right people when planning the proposal, and only if it’s necessary. These people should be the ones you’d trust not to spill the details to your partner. Also, the more people you involve, the more likely it is for the surprise to be discovered, so plan wisely.

4. Forget to Get the Necessary Permits

If you’re planning a public proposal somewhere at the San Francisco Ferry Building or in the middle of Chicago’s Millennium Park, then make it a priority to obtain the necessary permits because you don’t want the cops raining on your parade.

5. Forget It’s Your Day Too

It’s easy to get swept up in the planning process and forget that the proposal is as special for you as it is for your partner. To avoid feeling overwhelmed, think about your partner and how much they mean to you. When the proposal day comes, don’t forget to dress up for it and bask in every passing, precious moment.

6. Be Casual About It

The tradition of proposing on one knee can be traced back to medieval times, when knights would bow before noblewomen. While this gesture has evolved over time and is now optional, we still recommend carrying out your proposal with love and respect, regardless of whether you choose to kneel or not. Make sure your proposal is meaningful and sincere, as it’s a significant moment for both of you.

7. Forget a Post-Proposal Plan

You did it! You popped the question, got the ‘Yes’ you were hoping for and swapped her promise ring with a beautiful engagement ring. Now it’s time to pop the champagne and celebrate. Whether it’s an intimate celebration or one with your close family and friends who were lurking behind the bushes – be sure you plan for it as well.

Frequently Asked Questions

Q1. How do I deal with nerves on the day of the proposal?

Think of your partner and remember that they love you and want to be with you. You’ve likely discussed marriage prior to popping the question, which should make you enthusiastic about the future and help you see past the nerves of the present.

Q2. Is it okay to propose in public?

A public proposal is an endearing gesture, provided that it is something you’re certain your partner will love. If they love grand gestures, then they would certainly love a public proposal. But if they’re the reserved kind, consider opting for an intimate proposal.

Q3. What should I do after the proposal?

After you’ve popped the question and gotten the ‘yes’ you’ve been hoping for, don’t leave it at that – go out to celebrate. You can also call your loved ones to inform them of the wonderful news.

Q4. How can I make sure my proposal is a surprise?

Create a decoy story and involve some trusted family and friends to help you by corroborating your story and acting as accomplices.

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